Jer Hayes
There was a time when the golden arches stood for more than a cheap meal, especially outside the United States. Those arches were the stormtroopers of American culture, marching alongside Coca-Cola, American Football, and Pro-Wrestling. When the world was divided into three, and one empire ruled the first, American culture was devoured voraciously, served in Big Mac containers that would never biodegrade.
Someday, a future archaeologist sifting through the detritus of a landfill in Dublin or Manchester or Munich will uncover those polystyrene foam relics. Votive offerings to a global empire.
The first drive-thru McDonald’s in Western Europe opened in Dublin in 1985. They called it the “McDrive.” In a country where people were still the main export, the idea of driving a car to order food felt otherworldly. That other world was the one we saw on TV. It had American TV shows: crime shows where justice always prevailed, comedies where the main character had the last laugh. This was when TV was still a box in the corner of the room, dominating our evenings. No binge-watching, no on-demand but you could switch channels. Just sitting in front of the bright glow, soaking in the steady coffee drip of Americana.
Even that box sold us the dream. Cops with coffee and doughnuts, detectives grabbing burgers on their way to a stakeout. American cars! Huge, shiny, and far cooler than anything on our streets where there were no new cars. These cops were always cruising through that shining city on a hill.
When that drive-thru opened, it felt like civilization had finally reached Dublin. But that’s the nature of Americana: it makes you forget you already have a culture. It replaces what’s yours with something shinier. The breezy smile and bleached peroxide cleanliness of the invader. Wow, we can eat a burger in a car just like they do on TV. The shining city on the hill would surely have a drive-thru, and everyone would be happy.
But fast food became a dirty word. These days, we obsess over health. Is this burger good for me? Is American democracy healthy? Or has it become an ultra-processed system, engineered for the convenience of those who can afford to super-size their donations? Is the drive-thru only for oligarchs now?
The shining city on the hill was always an illusion. Propaganda wrapped in polystyrene foam. But unlike those containers it couldn’t last forever. And yet, I still go to the golden arches. When I do I order a large Big Mac meal with a diet coke. Hey, we have to watch our weight. And with the first bite, I wish I could still believe in that shining city.
Jer Hayes is a new (old) writer from Dublin, Ireland. His work has appeared in The Pan Haiku Review, Cosmic Daffodil Journal, Outside the Box, and AEOS Magazine. He has degrees in Psychology and Computer Science from University College Dublin.
Insta: @sherlockhayes X: @hayes_jer
Featured photo by Jer Hayes
